You Know You're Not In Cambodia Anymore WHEN...

...you see this sign:


AND, when your date lets you know how disappointed she is that you discarded the milk that she wanted to drink!

Happy to report that Pattaya is still a great place to be! Except the prices - as everyone else has reported - have gone up. I'm not quite the "handsome man" that I used to be. Dredge seemed to relish this fact. May the rain Gods descend upon him during his ride up-country.

How about this guy? How much could you sue for?

Suckered By Stripper, Man Sues

Arizonan says he was taken for $175k ride by topless dancer

OCTOBER 26--In a remarkably embarrassing new lawsuit, an Arizona man claims that he was bilked out of $175,000 by a Phoenix stripper who played him for a sucker for three years. According to a Superior Court complaint, a copy of which you'll find below, gullible Zachary Hull, 39, met Kimberly Jennings in November 2001 while she was working as a topless dancer. Jennings claimed that she stripped to pay for her college tuition and "painted a tale of woe and honest needs" so that Hull would "feel sorry for her," alleges the complaint. Hull told Jennings that she should stop dancing and "that they should get to know each other and become friends. In exchange he would assist her with money for her financial needs." From that point, Hull contends, Jennings fed him lie after lie so that she could "manipulate [him] into providing her with funds." The list of stories (or "false representations" as they are called in the lawsuit) swallowed by Hull is lengthy, covering everything from supposed chest infections and dental surgery to breast cancer treatment and moving expenses. Hull claimed when he confronted Jennings about her finances, she would become defensive and warn that if he did not cover her expenses she would return to stripping. Jennings "actively concealed" her real name, and the fact that she was married and had children, claimed Hull, who also named Jennings's husband as a defendant in his fraud complaint. Hull is seeking the return of his $175k, along with interest and legal fees.

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/1026053hull1.html

Scambodia Indeed

cock gobblers...

Not to get off on a rant here, but anyone recently try to redeem points on their 'travel' credit card for an award flight? Well I have.

Will someone explain to me why the same Eva Air flights between PP and Vancouver can be had by any schmuck on the planet with an internet connection and $1140.80 while the multi-gazillion dollar bank hosting my bong thom Platinum Visa is charged $2900 and change?

Only reason I care is this: 100,000 points = $2000. Anything in excess has to be paid by the redeemer. Fine, as long as the sticker is more or less the same for everyone. Looking up other crap in the redemption schedule I found the following.

Callaway x20 Gold Iron set: 97,500 points. Cost online: $699.00
Samsung 32" HD LCD TV: 148,500 points. Actual cost: $709.99
Modavo Mens Classic Watch: 79,500 points... $695.00

Seems to be a pattern here. I didn't even book a flight but in the process I burned up close to three clams in Skype credit. That ain't much, but at 2.1 cents a minute that's alot of time listening to some soul-less drone spouting corporate rhetoric. Actually had to call them up again to make sure I got it right: Hello Mr. Ubercon, and how may I offer you excellent service today?

Point is, just in case you're wondering why you're still here give yourself a fresh one across the kisser. Although it's catching on faster than most of us would like it's still an oasis for the hypnotically challenged.

Anyway, think I'm leaning toward the clubs...

New Found Appreciation

In my younger days, I really dug the Olympics. It was all about the competition and wanting to see the US win as many medals as they could.

At some point, I seemed to have outgrown that stage and I haven't paid much attention to them in several years. What have I been missing???

These are not your father's Olympians!!!

And I certainly never thought that I would be supporting Chinese athletes. But when they look like this AND they promote Anchor...WIN WIN!!!

For some reason, this photo seems appropriate here:

So do these...

And I'm not partial to just the Asians!

But then again...

They even had cheerleaders!

















Finally, Michael who?


Somehow I suspect that London 2012 just won't be the same.

Who woulda thunk

The remote to the TV has been dying a slow death. Bong even offered to sell his big screen out of the pawn shop. That would solve the problems except being out 300 bucks due to a remote. For a 600 dollar TV though, it seemed worth it, besides I don’t think Bong put as many hours watching it as is spent in the pawn shop.

In the end I took apart the remote to see what made it work. Hmmmm…. Rubber buttons seemed ok. There wasn’t a wear point where they made contact, and the contact point was just a flat circuit board. Some how the rubber buttons just jumped the wire road map. The circuit board was a bit oily and some of the buttons weren’t as oily. Hmmmmm again.

Decided to wipe off all the oil from the circuit board and the buttons.. Dabbed a little of NASA’s greatest invention (ASTROGLIDE) on both the board and the buttons. Put the sides back together and gave it a whirl. Up volume gliding off the screen. Damn, too much astro. Opened the device up again and took a little off the buttons and the circuit board and now it works like a charm.

Heart: il est merde!

The lengths some guys go to get a girl...

Friday night at Heart and the french dude on the dance floor won't leave the guy's live-in alone (apparently the french guy has a history of yama, AND hassling the girl). Words are exchanged, situation escalates, but a messy situation is averted.
.
Heart packed and nearly impossible to get a drink, so the party moves to Zep. Everyone chilling enjoying the show when Pepe la Pew shows up, apparently hot on the scent. Relocate to WA with Pepe in close proximity.
.
Almost at the doorway when Pepe says something to the BF. 3-strikes already, and a shove bounces Pepe off the Walkabout sign onto the pavement between the bikes. Pepe's rubbing is melon and bawling like a school-room sissy in front of WA 5-0, while BF tries to leave peacefully. Pepe stumbles to his feet and blocks his exit so we push the bike down the street a little to avoid running him over. Coming back for more, another little shove (and crying fit) is necessary before the cheese eating surrender monkey allows him to leave.
.
Later on BF gets over 20 SMS's covering prosecution, retribution, reconciliation and pretty much everything in between. WA Justice: BF not allowed in until having a wee chat with the manager. sigh...
.
Yama's a hell of a drug!! If you can't hold it and happen to be whiney, weak and French, consider restricting yourself to wine and cigarettes. It'll be the healthier choice in the long run.

Charity Event Gala!

Murray and his Harley Bikers group will be holding a fund raiser at Huxley's Friday night. I think this a Toys for Tots kind of thing - $ to buy toys for needy kids.

Who can't get behind that?

The Details:
No idea. Can't recall what you should bring ($10 or $20?), what time it kicks off (I guess if you go around 7 or 8 it'd be cool), and I have no idea if you should bring toys (probably not.)

I should have been paying attention to the conversation but hey, 3 martinis in - it's a miracle I remember this much.

Should be a lot of good people there and Robbie may or may not have food out for attendees....Anyway, be there. It's good for your karma. You'll have a good time, and you can be rest assured, your money will actually go to buying stuff for the kids. Not towards wax for the Land Cruiser.

Anyone with more info about this, please chime in.

1 + 2 + 4 = ?

Zer0!

As in 1 ticket gets you 2 drinks for the price of 4 dollars and results in 0 people from the dark continent showing up at the Big M. Seems Team JC got their act together and the brothers have to buy a ticket at the door before entering. This past weekend, none of them was willing to pay the steep price and the decor was much brighter. Are these the customers that any business wants?

The Trapdoor Spider seems to have caught himself one in the front door...and a cutie at that! Will he be able to refrain from his trapdoor-spider-ways? Plenty of us multi-legged creatures awaiting any fallout. Seriously, good catch and good luck spidey!

Undiscovered History - What's up with CCTV taking away my Discovery Channel and replacing it with the History Channel? No problems with the History Channel, as I have already watched a few good documentaries (including one about Pol Pot, which seemed to have been produced shortly after his death 10 years ago), but certainly not at the expense of the Discovery Channel! That means no more Mythbusters, Dirty Jobs, Future Weapons, or American Chopper (OK, I can emphatically state that I will not miss those meatheads!). Also missing is Animal Planet being replaced with something called Explore - yeah, I'll take that poofter Jeff Corwin over the AC knuckleheads anyday. Come on fellows, screw with the Frog Channel or the Russian channel, but not my Discovery!

The Gameroom/Crackhouse across the street from Walkabout has been shut down and not a minute too soon. Saw the games being hauled out a few days ago and the place has been closed since. Good F*cking riddence you losers.

One final thing that Dredge forgot to add about Prohibition Night. Before we ran off to import our own Mekong, but after we were able to find a few cans of brew on Street 63, we needed a place to enjoy them. We discovered that there could be no better place than the concrete bench half way down the street from WA. While imbibing, we were treated to a "monkey-open-coconut" (ala Ko Samui) show performed by an 8-year-old glue-sniffing simian, while a monstrously-goitered crack whore tried to entice us with her "goods' - ahhh...just like the old days!

A Dollar Well Spent

Walkabout Dead:
Well, not the bar. Just some dude in it. Sources say he'd been dead 2 days before someone entered the room and found him. No idea who, what, or why. (Just the when and where.) One report - he fell in the bathroom and hit his head. Damn...Anyone got the 411?

Elections:
Muchachos back from the villages with tales from the ballet box. Jap vote checkers gave the elections a big thumbs-up, and I'm not going to argue. Mainly because I refuse to care. I concern myself with the better things in LIFE. But there were hijinks, and I feel for villagers who stood in line all day, got to the ballot table, and learned they'd already voted. (They get pretty high out there, possible they voted and forgot about it....) Many wondered where all the Vietnamese names on the voter lists came from.

Sam Rainsy Party HQ:
Cops everywhere. The hard looking ones in olive drab - the dudes that actually work*; the ones they give guns and bikes. Badass and camped out front of my favorite VN coffee shop. (4 strong baggies of jet-black java for 2000.) At first I thought there was a massive raid on the meth mall at the projects, but no. They were there to protect the SRP from people out to harm them. Or something...

The important thing is - it's not my business. Hopefully they'll be gone by tomorrow, so I can get my PM caffeine boost.

Not in the LP Guide**:
Allerin (cold/cough syrup) by United American Pharmaceuticals (Philippines) Dosage- One swig and a couple hits...great buzz: $1/bottle. Give it a shot....

Because we all get some satisfaction from a dollar well spent.



(*Well.....)

(**Or that candy ass, rainbow-striped Footprint Guide)

Bring the Party with You

Election 2008
Mellow Day. Russian market for some jeans ($7) - place is still a fucking nightmare but I scored some American Dad dvds and some Camel shirts ($7). Smiling fucker at the DVD stall said he was giving me a good price - $2/disc. (I hate the Russian Market.)

Lucky Market on the way home for some supplies. Lucky closed Sunday so everyone and their mother was there to stock up on hand cream, tissues and diet coke (maybe it was just me...)

Anyway, applause to Robbie for a pre-lection day party complete with booze, smoke and enough BBQ to feed an army. I'm still full. Big shout out to Lanzi and his crack staff for the grill-work. Pork chops, steaks, 4 kinds of sausages and whatever rub/marinade they were using - a fucking WIN. I'm still full. Next time you are looking to throw a party - check out Dan Meats. The best butcher in town and not expensive.

Walkabout:
Supposed to be serving on the 2nd floor but someone narc'd and the cops made them stop. Death to informants (!!) but the place had a decent crowd anyway. I fired up beforehand - not into experiencing Walk sans-buzz. I needn't have bothered.

Discretely, take an ass-pocket bottle of Mekong, some sprite, red bull, soda water and fruit plate and you've got a summertime cocktail that Martha Stewart wished she'd come up with. They should dub it, "The Confidential." Cheers to Dredge and Khmerican for taking the initiative to bring the party to the bar. And cheers for Publisher for making a special trip home to bring back a refill when the first bottle was kicked.

And tonight....I'll let you know.

Pattaya...It's coming.